Most people know that coming home after university is not easy. Mainly because you get so used to being by yourself you forget what family life usually means; I am talking about eating dinner at respectable times and coming home at reasonable hours and telling every single family member what you are doing and where you are going. You have a genetic obligation to send text messages about your whereabouts and dinner plans. I have always been terrible at that. It’s hard to have your life together when your plans are a random collection of ideas.
Lately, things have been different. I am at the stage in my life where I’m expected to be the responsible daughter. In fact, it isn’t an expectation but more a natural instinct. I am past the days where cleaning the dishes triggered a voluntary facial stroke. There were times when taking the rubbish out was so outrageous a request, I would rather run a marathon. Responsibility hits people at different points in their life but for me, especially with the independence I’m used to, I got stuck into it quite early.
Off course, I wake up in the morning and empty the dishes, take the rubbish out, do my bed and clean the cupboard, make lunch, and do other bits and bobs… doing things for my family takes the guilt away from being helpless during university. Don’t get me wrong though, like most to-be-adults, my life isn’t all that boring because I want to make the most out of my four months of summer. Mechanical engineering isn’t exactly known for it’s party-reputation. In fact, the glum, appreciative faces of most people suggest the exact opposite. So as you can imagine, the library recluse is now the social butterfly. (Or at least, I like to pretend I have friends.)
I guess I am living a sort of double role. It’s just struck me that when you get out there, when you start sorting your shit out, and move out of the four walls you are protected in, you start leading multiple roles. It’s not just about what you want to do any more. It’s about things you have to do and finding that balance is essential. Maybe that’s why we suck at adulthood sometimes – we miss the days where role-playing was a choice and not our whole lives.