It’s late summer. Results have come out. And there are confused vibes of depression and excitement ringing in the air, interfering destructively.
For some of us, realisation has hit our guts like a canon ball going 125mph. We’re now part of this cruel, yet just, selection process. A process simply defined by achievement. And the sad fact is, if you get the grades, you get in. If You don’t, well, too bad.
We’ve hit the road. And we’re on the go.
As far as grades go, I wasn’t particularly happy with my AS results. I got AAAB which equates to 94% in Maths, 82% in Physics, 81% in Product Design, 79% in Chemistry. (I was completely fine with maths by the way, but 82% in physics? And 81% in Product design? I was absolutely gob smacked). The problem was staring at me in the face – Low As meant twice the chance of being pulled down to ‘Bs’ next year. Low As meant twice the workload.
Hard work is everything. You know when it’s a clear day and you look into your reflection in water and the reflection is so clear you almost believe there is someone else staring back at you? My results reflected hard work like clear water that day. The modules I worked hard on pulled up my results. The modules I didn’t work for pulled them down. There weren’t any mistakes or miscalculations. It was that straightforward.
And I could feel it. More than anyone else. I knew I hadn’t bothered with my chemistry and product design exam or my physics practicals, and I knew how badly it affected my results.
The cold hard truth stared blankly at me in the face.
Next year is going to get tougher. Retakes + No modular exams meant exam madness in summer. Not to mention the pressure of getting in to university.
So what next?
The weird thing is, I’m actually okay with the challenge, even if it means I have to remove the word “socialise” from my dictionary. I want to get into good universities so I have to work hard, and I no longer complain at the idea of staying at home to work. In fact, I cherish it. More time to finish coursework? Who wouldn’t be happy with that?
I can’t even think of getting into dating. My “boyfriends” would have to compete with my books, get frustrated and pretty much dump me 2 weeks later. I’d be sleeping with my books more than my boyfriend – Can you imagine the competition?
I couldn’t actually care less any more.
Is that wrong of me? To alienate myself from the human world of communication, to prevent myself from getting into any sort of relationship, only because I am far too attached to my education? It’s not like I’m going to be completely distant anyway – I go to college – I hang out between lessons – that should be enough right?
But that’s that though.
Life, as I have previously known it, has taken a steep turn. What was once a dream, a winding mess of aspirations, is now a journey. A path to success. And here’s what, guys: